We're Programmed Wrong

When someone's being selfishly demanding, our instinctive reaction is to try to deny them what they want, when actually that selfish behavior indicates that they need our generosity. Our usual reaction to someone being angry is to run away or to return anger, "fighting fire with fire". Instead, we should help them try to figure out what to do about the situation that's making them angry, even if they're being angry at us. If they're so angry that they can't start to deal with the situation, we should just patiently let them be angry.

long vs. short, II: meat and murder

For instance, many people like to eat meat, but don't want to know about the lives of the animals involved and the processing entailed before their bodies wind up on dinner plates. Would more people be vegetarian if they had to be directly involved in farming and slaughtering?

Similarly, if people everywhere felt the same thing as relatives of people killed in Iraq or the US Gulf coast, would we still be debating when or if to leave Iraq, or whether to plan for the greatest benefit to those displaced (instead of for the benefit of the companies which received no-bid contracts)?

long vs. short lengthscale interactions

Something that's puzzled me, and about which I've probably commented earlier, is, somewhat flippantly, why knowing something and experiencing something aren't the same. For example, if your child were killed in a bombing, you'd likely engage in activities that helped to numb your pain: withdrawal, crying, drinking, travel, political activism, whatever. But just our knowing that this happens to all too many people these days doesn't affect the rest of us that much. We go on living our lives more or less as usual because, after all, it hasn't "happened to us", a way of thinking which strikes me as somewhat tautological. It didn't "happen to us" because we insist that it didn't. But how can these things not happen "to us", since we exist and they happen?

Job?

Okay, now that I'm married, the next items on the agenda are finishing up a bunch of unpaid work and getting a job. If the demand for renewable energy is growing so much, and if markets do so well at allocating resources, why aren't people banging on my door to hire me? Perhaps because I have yet to build the series of bright flashing neon signs which point them to it.

Married

I don't think there are very many people who read this blog who don't know, but I got married last Sunday. It was a bit of effort getting it together, but altogether it went very well. The weather even cooperated, with the clouds clearing so rays of sun slanted through the redwood grove. Family left yesterday and this morning, and there are a few more tasks to finish up, but it's pretty much done. For those who came, and especially those who helped out in some way, thank you! We had a wonderful time.

A common question was whether or not we were going away somewhere. For those who didn't get to ask us, the answer is "no". After going to Eritrea and Burning Man (which was great this year), we're staying put for a while. Besides, where better to have some relaxing time than scenic North Beach, San Francisco? And we want to get together with all those friends with whom we got to talk only so briefly on Sunday. :)